Say It Isn’t So

say it isn't so...

Last few months, I accompanied my elder brother to attend his graduation day at Kuala Kedah. We stayed in a hotel, which is near to his friend’s house. Actually, his friend is his ex-girlfriend. They just break up but personally speaking, they don’t behave like they are likely in a call to quit their relationship. I wonder why…

Few days we spend in Kuala Kedah, got connected with her family members and become close to her, I think she is a good person. Even my dad and mom also confessed that they like her and got no problem to take her as their daughter-in-law. 
But my brother said, “It will never be the case". I wonder why...

She is pretty, incredibly a nice person and very hardworking. I don’t understand what makes them stopped the anxiety to be in love zone.  

I lose my words when my brother telling me a thing I really wanted to know.

“I’m the elder son in this family. Sorry for taking law, graduate a bit late from other people. But it’s okay because I’ll take the responsibility to take care of you and our siblings. Dad has no need to worry. I’m not going to marry early. She's good but I’m not going to make her waiting for me for soo long. She has a right to move on. If she meets someone better, she can leave me. But if she has a strong feeling about me, end up to her on making decision. What is matter most for me right now is our family”.

Seriously! He was the second truly charismatic person after dad, I met. I am intensely motivated by his thinking style. So this story, affects to the decision taken by me in the next story.

He is sitting left next to my mom..

I’m twenty three by this year. Tell me what is the possible reaction I should give when I still studying while most of my friends had already finished their studies, keep sending me an invitation cards for wedding and keep uploading pictures of their newborn babies and at the end of those happy days, I still struggling reading books, sending assignments, taking part time jobs during semester breaks and enjoy my life to the fullest as…as a student?

I’m not rushing into a relationship, but it doesn't mean that I have no trust in love. Being workaholic is pretty cool but being alone, especially during those happy days is totally not cool! I have so many male friends..but too busy to deal with my personal needs. I’m afraid of having ‘a feeling of closeness’ with a guy thus, I had rejected few, though they are good. I hope God will forgive me for declining the tendency to answer a call ‘say it isn’t so’. Being interested with someone or showing excitement in giving hint ‘i love you!’ is no longer a mission.

I’m denying an interest in searching for men love. Of course, I can’t hold it during my weakest time. Well, yoall know...women are known for their natural freckle minded behavior. Then, I realize I have God. I have my family. So what to worry about being alone? What I believe is right person will show up at a right time and at a right place.    

I understand my brother a little better. I've made same decision like what he did before. We are cool. We can keep ourselves busy and deal with subjects which we feel strongly about. I’m sorry if this writing might seems irritating for some readers who seeks for motivation, not for this never-ending complain. 

What would you say? To fall in love, it is by chance. But to stay in love, it is by choice. If you get a chance to fall in love with a right person, appreciate it. Say what you need to say. 
A happy ending story? It is your choice....