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What..??? |
I won't call myself as a LOSER even though I could not
recall number of mistakes I have did before. I still young. My parents are still
alive and they are the biggest contributor of my life expenses. What? I did
well in my studies!
I’m telling you. I’m not a prostitute. I don't take drug
or drink alcohol. I just made some mistakes which make me love myself more. And
it is not necessary to label all prostitutes, drug dealers and drinkers as bad
persons. Sometime, they are more precious than other normal, pious and nerdo
people who think they are good person. Sometime.
Take this reading as an opportunity to understand the
reality of young people’s life. Perhaps,
you can make comparison between yours and mine and finally, improve the quality of
your personal value.
I don’t feel sorry about
my self even though I have done many mistakes…Why?
1) I did well in class presentations but I spoiled
on my law papers during examination. Thanks God, I still able to graduate from
law school and people still praise me as a law student. One of my lecturers always call
me as his legal advisor. YOLO.
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Near to be true is not necessary true. |
2) I dated with the wrong person. I mean..person(s).
As time goes on, I realize what I really wanted in future. I create my own
values and set my goals. This reminds me not to be a despereto. To be truth, they
are good guys. It is only matter of time.
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Stay calm and no hurry. |
3) I chose
a wrong course. Sorry to think that teaching is a suck job. At first, I don't
like taking English course at UPSI..coz my biggest hope is to be an advocate.
Not to be an English teacher. But then looking to my achievement,
I found my real strengths. I can speak English, lecturers are good with me, I
get new friends (other than Malays friends) and I get involve in many writing
activities. I just follow the flow. Like YOLO.
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Seriously..?? |
4) I feel not entitle to have or deserve to be. My
mom said I'm a good daughter. My lecturers told me I’m a good student and my
friends called me as a nice person. But still, there are people out there who are
better than me. So it explains why do I feel like 'this position isn’t suits
with me', 'I shouldn’t take this responsibility' and bla..bla. I’m not a ‘full-time’
princess.
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This ain't a fairy tale... |
5) I had a hitting-rock-bottom’s time. The fact
is, not all people love to see your happiness and success. I do have haters and haters are everywhere. But I
still found good friends, good people around me. What a life...
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Wearing masks... |
6) I have been suspended. At least once. I've been
working part time while studying. So, there is one time when my friends came to
my work place. They want to cheer me up but thing comes to the other way around.
From the cctv, my bos caught my friends sitting and standing near me next to the
cash counter. You know, this breach the ethics of working. I should have prevented
them to come near. I didn't intend to do so and I had actually asked them to
leave but it doesn’t works. Finally Mr. Nasim had kicked me off for two weeks holiday
without payment and it turns me down. Till now, I never tell them about this. I
cried alone.
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Stop the moment. |
7) I have sat for MUET three times. What? My parents
are not English people and English is not my mother tongue! I really had a hard
time repeating this expensive paper for many times, just to ensure that I can
continue my studies in law and TESL. Haha. There is no harm to have a big goal.
Well, it is worth because finally I managed to get a good result.
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Arguable. It makes sense! |
8) I’ve made wrong decisions, for wrong persons
and for wrong reasons. Below the age of 30, I considered my self as a young
learner (what a good excuse..). However, I never feel regret for the choice
I've made. Learning is a long process right?
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You learn until you die. |
9) I have said something without considering
anyone else's feelings. This is a big NO NO mistake I’ve been made, especially
when I think that I am right about other people. Actually, it is not. I know
nothing about other people's heart. I just love to be honest. If I don't like
something or someone, the whole world will get notice about it.
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Its not difficult to understand sign. |
10) I have been walked away from difficult situations.
I did a big mistake and later on, I trust that I don't deserve to seek for forgiveness.
Neither to think that I owe strength to tell people about my sins nor to ask
them to rectify my mistakes, the truth is, I shamed to admit my faults. That's
it.
11) I went out to KL, spend time and money with
friends even though it is not necessary. I'm actually a bloody hell STINGY
woman but it doesn’t mean that I couldn’t be a good frugal person. Not to blame
my friends, I'm the one who should have the courage to say 'NO' when they ask
me whether to join or not. Well, time cannot be turns back.
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Say 'NO' to the unnecessary matters. |
12) I have offended someone with my humours. Highlight
this: when you get close with your friends and be like in a comfort zone, you’ll
forget that everyone have hearts and feelings. My mistake is, I always do not realize
about this. My bad...
13) I have been risked everything. In one shot!
There are times when I need to come out with my own decision and I risked
everything for the uncertain things. Shame on me…
14) Be passive. I'm a good talker but I tend to
be passive when I am in a cloudy mood. It's tiring to fake a smile all the time
when watching dramas. The good thing of being passive, I won’t get headache.
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Baa..baa..black sheep, have you any wools? |
15) I think I have all the right answers. Actually
not. I have a list of life rules but not all the rules are successfully been applied. Dealing
with delicate matters? Sorry, I'm not a good legal advisor.
16) I have blamed someone for my mistakes. Forget
for what reason but I’m not happy at all doing so.
17) Think negative about my self. When I couldn’t
fix problems or find the right solutions, I'll started to think bad about my self.
Normally it won't last longer because at the end of the day, after I cleaned
my room or took bath, I will forgive my self and say..'this is not the end of
my life'.
So, what about your story? Is it the same with those
situations? Read more…